You may be an engineer...

PS: I'm not going to admit (at least not publically) how many of these I said yes to.

(Author: Jose Herrero (jose@borg.harvard.edu).)

You may be an engineer...

* If Dilbert is your hero.

* If you stare at an orange juice container because it says CONCENTRATE.

* If you want an 8X CDROM for Christmas.

* If you can name 6 Star Trek episodes.

* If the only jokes you receive are through e-mail.

* If your wrist watch has more computing power than a 486DX2-50.

* If your idea of good interpersonal communication means getting the decimal point in the right place.

* If you look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids' toys.

* If you introduce your wife as "mylady@home.wife".

* If your spouse sends you an e-mail instead of calling you to dinner.

* If you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie.

* If you use a CAD package to design your son's Pine Wood Derby car.

* If you have used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts.

* If, at Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string.

* If you window shop at Radio Shack.

* If your ideal evening consists of fast-forwarding through the latest Sci-Fi movie looking for technical inaccuracies.

* If you have "Dilbert" comics displayed anywhere in your work area.

* If you carry on a one-hour debate over the expected results of a test that actually takes five minutes to run.

* If you are convinced you can build a phaser out of your garage door opener and your camera's flash attachment.

* If you don't even know where the cover to your personal computer is.

* If you have modified your can-opener to be microprocessor driven.

* If you know the direction the water swirls when you flush.

* If you own "Official Star Trek" anything.

* If you have ever taken the back off your TV just to see what's inside.

* If a team of you and your co-workers have set out to modify the antenna on the radio in your work area for better reception.

* If you ever burned down the gymnasium with your Science Fair project.

* If you are currently gathering the components to build your own nuclear reactor.

* If you own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts.

* If you have never backed-up your hard drive.

* If you are aware that computers are actually only good for playing games, but are afraid to say it out loud.

* If you truly believe aliens are living among us.

* If you have ever saved the power cord from a broken appliance.

* If you have ever purchased an electronic appliance "as-is".

* If you see a good design and still have to change it.

* If the sales people at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions.

* If you still own a slide rule and you know how to work it.

* If the thought that a CD could refer to finance or music never enters your mind.

* If you own a set of itty-bitty screw drivers, but you don't remember where they are.

* If you rotate your screen savers more frequently than your automobile tires.

* If you have a functioning home copier machine, but every toaster you own turns bread into charcoal.

* If you have more toys than your kids.

* If you need a checklist to turn on the TV.

* If you have introduced your kids by the wrong name.

* If you have a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work.

* If your I.Q. number is bigger than your weight.

* If the microphone or visual aids at a meeting don't work and you rush up to the front to fix it.

* If you can remember 7 computer passwords but not your anniversary.

* If you have memorized the program schedule for the Discovery Channel and have seen most of the shows already.

* If you have ever owned a calculator with no equal key and know what RPN stands for.

* If your father sat 2 inches in front of your family's first color TV with a magnifying lens to see how they made the colors, and you grew up thinking that was normal.

* If you know how to take the cover off of your computer, and what size screw driver to use.

* If you can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting.

* If people groan at the party when you pick out the music.

* If you can't remember where you parked your car for the 3rd time this week.

* If you did the sound system for your senior prom.

* If your checkbook always balances.

* If your wristwatch has more buttons than a telephone.

* If you have more friends on the Internet than in real life.

* If you thought the real heroes of "Apollo 13" were the Mission Controllers.

* If you think that when people around you yawn, it's because they didn't get enough sleep.

* If you spend more on your home computer than your car.

* If you know what http:/ stands for.

* If you've ever tried to repair a $5.00 radio.

* If you have a neatly sorted collection of old bolts and nuts in your garage.

* If your three year old son asks why the sky is blue and you try to explain atmospheric absorption theory.

* If your lap-top computer costs more than your car.

* If your 4 basic food groups are: 1. Caffeine 2. Fat 3. Sugar 4. Chocolate.